Archives For divorce

With good intentions, we often warn single Christians about the relational damage associated with premarital sex. In a noble desire to urge single believers to follow God’s design of abstinence before marriage, we can unwittingly sabotage God’s design after marriage if we’re not just as pastoral claiming the victory of God over confessed sin as […]

Read More

In March of 2014, when Lisa and I landed in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba it felt unbearably hot, even for a couple traveling from Houston, Texas. And the Navy chaplain escorting us around said, “Congratulations—you came here during the coolest time of the year.” Lisa and I have gotten to work with the military quite a […]

Read More

If you are in a relationship in which you are constantly taking and never giving anything in return… I’m an expert at killing—plants, that is. No matter what I do, I cannot seem to keep my plants alive. They call it having a black thumb and I have officially self-diagnosed myself as having one. I’m […]

Read More
December 5, 2019

The Bare Marriage Project

Guest Author — 

I spent my honeymoon night in tears—because sex hurt. A lot. I had no idea what was wrong with me. It wasn’t supposed to be this painful! But I was married now, and I believed my husband needed sex and I had been taught that he wouldn’t feel love without it. So over the next […]

Read More

If you adopt a wolverine and pour all your love into that animal; if you treat it like a puppy, hugging it and feeding it and playing with it; if you give it the very best care anyone has ever given to a wolverine, the day will still come when that wolverine will attack you, […]

Read More

I want to make your life much easier, more joyful, less stressful, more productive, healthier, and richer relationally and spiritually. You up for that? I grew up in Washington State, famous for its rain in the West and its apples in the East (Washington produces about 2/3 of our nation’s apples grown for immediate consumption). […]

Read More

After I had been hitting my head against a wall dealing with a toxic individual, asking myself “Why?” and “How do I fix this/handle this/deal with this?” a wise friend, Dr. Steve Wilke, dispensed some life-changing advice. He urged me not to deal with it but to simply walk away. “I want you to go […]

Read More
June 19, 2019

Never Surrender

Gary Thomas — 

A divorce lawyer recently posted an article arguing that the vow “till death do us part” is passé, unrealistic, and needs to be discarded. There’s no shame, he said, in knowing that it’s unlikely and “even rare” for marriages to last for a lifetime, so let’s stop with the pretense. He admitted children face some […]

Read More
March 27, 2019

The Ongoing Sin of Divorce

Gary Thomas — 

Heather married a Christian man who seemed zealous to serve God. He gave generous amounts of money to God’s work and even dreamed of eventually doing a reverse tithe—giving away ninety percent of his income and keeping ten percent for himself. Today he’s still involved in missions work, still gives away a lot of money, […]

Read More
November 14, 2018

God Made Us Needy

Gary Thomas — 

A blockbuster quote from a blockbuster book (Unwanted) by Jay Stringer unmasks what I have seen but been unable to describe in marriage: “Few of my male clients recognize any needs they have except for sex. This puts a tremendous strain on their partners to be sexual in order to experience intimacy. The pressure men […]

Read More