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To understand how difficult it is to be married to a certain kind of person, you need to know that the Bible was written in a desert. The Promised Land is described as a place of “milk and honey” but even the most generous of geographers would call it “arid.” Average temperatures run in the […]

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July 11, 2019

Your Wife’s Privacy

Gary Thomas — 

A friend of mine is a medical doctor who has held the beating heart of a living person in his hands. That blows me away. I can’t even imagine that kind of responsibility. But here’s the thing: every husband has his wife’s “spiritual heart” beating in his hands every day. Our wives make themselves just […]

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[This is an excerpt adapted from my book Loving Him Well: Practical Advice on Influencing Your Husband. Accordingly, it’s focused on wives, but most husbands could figure out the opposite application. Let me also state that this chapter was written for women in satisfying or perhaps disappointing but not abusive relationships.] No woman gets to […]

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Now that we’re empty nesters, Lisa travels with me on most of my trips, at least the pleasant ones. Winnipeg in February? Pass. New York City in the Fall? Book two tickets, please. In our new season of joint travel, Lisa had an uncanny ability to always turn the wrong direction coming out of the […]

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One of the most important qualities in a spouse for a successful life and marriage is something I never even considered when I was single. I’m not talking about faith in God—I certainly considered that. Physical attraction mattered a lot to me, and I’m not saying that physical appearance doesn’t matter at all. But there’s […]

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March 27, 2019

The Ongoing Sin of Divorce

Gary Thomas — 

Heather married a Christian man who seemed zealous to serve God. He gave generous amounts of money to God’s work and even dreamed of eventually doing a reverse tithe—giving away ninety percent of his income and keeping ten percent for himself. Today he’s still involved in missions work, still gives away a lot of money, […]

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What if one of the most dangerous attitudes for believers is self-righteousness? What if it’s possible to be “right” and toxic at the same time? What if, in the name of doing God’s work, we find ourselves furthering the cause of Satan? I’ve been reading through Thomas Brooks’ Christian classic Precious Remedies Against Satan’s Devices. […]

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February 20, 2019

Your Day’s Not Done Until…

Gary Thomas — 

The way Lisa treats me might make some young women nauseous, because she serves me like we’re living in a 1950s sitcom. Just one example: because she cares so much about health and because she knows my taste buds on their own might lead me in a very different direction, Lisa tries to prepare every […]

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February 6, 2019

Ready or Knot?

Gary Thomas — 

As a pastor, Scott Kedersha has worked with more than 5,000 premarital couples to prepare them for their new life together. His book Ready or Knot? offers practical and Christ-centered guidance for engaged couples as they get ready for their special day. Scott asks some tough (but vital questions) and gives some great advice for premarital […]

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One thought from Angela Duckworth’s book Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance struck me as being particularly relevant for marriage. While Grit is mostly about work and vocation, apply the following thought in relational terms and you’ll see what I mean: “What ripens passion is the conviction that your work matters. For most people, […]

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