Archives For dating

January 10, 2017

A Tale of Two Wives

Gary Thomas — 

“All right,” the event organizer told me, “here’s your ride. His name is Terry.” You’ll have to forgive me for catching my breath, as Terry rolled up in a wheelchair. It was winter in Winnipeg, below freezing, and dark. And my driver, as I already said, was shaking my hand while sitting in a wheelchair. […]

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January 7, 2017

The Marriage You Want

Gary Thomas — 

If you’ve been reading this blog, you’ve heard me talking a lot lately about cherishing our spouse. What does cherish mean? How is cherish different from love? I recently came across a brilliant description of cherishing your spouse that was written hundreds of years ago by a surprising source. I say “surprising” because John Wesley […]

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December 27, 2016

Keeping Your Promise

Gary Thomas — 

  Wayne Williams grew up a Chicago Cubs fan because that was his father’s favorite team. As a young boy he and his dad would watch games on television, or listen to radio broadcasts in the car. The Cubs, of course, were famous for their futility; they hadn’t made it back to a World Series […]

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November 29, 2016

Enough is Enough

Gary Thomas — 

  “If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple.” Luke 14:26 What does it mean to “hate” someone we are elsewhere called to sacrificially love? We are told to love even our enemies, yet Jesus […]

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I’ve found men are most motivated to change during two times in a romantic relationship: Prior to the wedding (to get the woman to agree to marry them) and When a wife files for divorce. Those are the easiest times to get a man to reconsider and reform long-standing bad habits. If you’re single, you […]

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After a Sacred Search conference in which I had laid out essential character traits to look for in a future spouse, a group of six men asked a question. Five of them were convinced by what I had said; one wasn’t, and he’s the one who asked the question in the form of several statements: […]

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One of the most common questions I get about my book for singles, The Sacred Search, which gives a lot of advice about what to look for and what to avoid when choosing someone to marry, is “What if you can’t find a person like the one you describe?” Singles who ask this question, and […]

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A model in the 2013 issue of Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit edition called herself a “grandma” because she was appearing in her ninth consecutive issue. It’s apparently unusual for a model to do that kind of modeling for nearly a decade. Think about this—nine years and she’s a “grandma.” My wife and I have been married […]

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One of the least productive, and indeed most destructive mental exercises in marriage is to spend any time asking ourselves a spiritually dangerous question: “Did I marry the right person?” This question saps energy from something that can be done—focusing on taking a less than ideal situation to a better place—at the cost of solving […]

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How earnestly do you want to feel close to your spouse? Enough to kill something for it? “Anna’s” dad was an alcoholic, in the worst sort of way. Many noble people fight against this addiction, but some—Anna’s father—never bothered to fight. He just surrendered to its allure and allowed his family to deal with the […]

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