Archives For communication

September 21, 2017

He Ate My Chocolate

Gary Thomas — 

In premarital counseling, I tell couples, “Your ability to continue cherishing each other, treasuring each other and feeling close to each other will be directly tied to your ability to handle conflict in a way that brings you together instead of tearing you apart.” It doesn’t matter how strong your infatuation is, if you can’t […]

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September 7, 2017

For Worse

Gary Thomas — 

A woman from a war-torn country told an American, “The difference between Americans and the rest of the world is that you expect everything to go fine and are surprised when something bad happens. The rest of the world expects life to be dreary and is surprised when something good happens.” I don’t know about […]

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My son is getting two masters’ degrees at Harvard. Lisa says I shouldn’t tell people that because it sounds like I’m bragging but it’s relevant to the point I’m about to make, so please forgive me. Graham was visiting during a vacation and I noticed he was reading a pretty lengthy history book that didn’t […]

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August 24, 2017

Good in Bed

Gary Thomas — 

Thus I have become in his eyes like one bringing contentment.  Song of Songs 8:10 “Don’t let this lawyerly facade fool you,” Sandra Bullock warned Hugh Grant in the movie Two Weeks’ Notice. “I’m actually really good in bed.” I was eating an airline dinner, flying somewhere over the Midwest, when I put on the […]

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A lay counselor who has worked with hundreds of premarital couples told me that he particularly looks forward to the session when he lays out what he calls the “tough love truths” to the future bride (why he picks the bride for this, I’m not sure). During this session, David tells the woman that sometime […]

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If marriage conferences make you ill because your spouse doesn’t change; if marriage books and blogs like mine frustrate you because while you want to improve your marriage your spouse doesn’t and won’t; if you feel disconnected from your spouse and you seem to be the only one who notices or cares, what then? You […]

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July 28, 2017

Supernatural Marriage

Gary Thomas — 

How much more could Jesus have done on this earth if He had given Himself another thirty years of active ministry rather than three short years? Think about it. Jesus could have performed many more healings and miracles so that the church would number in the hundreds of thousands rather than the few hundred who […]

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Preachers and teachers on marriage (and I have been among them) often warn young moms about being moms first and wives second. It’s certainly a dangerous and ever-present temptation that deserves attention. But this post is for the young husbands who have their own temptation—expecting their wives to be more than any one woman could […]

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June 2, 2017

Men We are Third

Gary Thomas — 

  One of the most frequent requests I get is to write a book specifically for husbands. The reason I haven’t done that is largely because publishers know men don’t buy many books. I’ve brought up the possibility of doing a book for men in three different rounds of contract negotiations and the publishers always […]

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When Lisa and I were at the Love Song Couples’ Getaway in the Bahamas, we had a room large enough that, 45 minutes after checking in (I was still traveling in from Houston after preaching at Second that morning) Lisa texted me to say, “Ha! I just found a second full bathroom.” Troy and Marisha […]

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