Archives For building intimacy

May 26, 2015

I Was Born for This!

Gary Thomas — 

  “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”  (Prov. 17:17) You’d be miserable indeed if you trained to become a fireman and resented it every time there was a fire. Not that you want there to be a fire, but putting out fires is what you’re trained to do. […]

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May 16, 2015

Get Closer

Gary Thomas — 

Jorge was a typical soft middle-aged man when he got a taste for endurance sports. Within a year, he was absorbed in it. His body became chiseled, his weekends and evenings consumed with various competitions. His topic of conversation centered around training and times. Even his circle of friends gravitated toward those sharing the same […]

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To celebrate each other regularly during a lifelong love, you have to get creative with a lot of presents. If I get my wife just two things for Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, her birthday, our anniversary, and Christmas, that’s ten distinct presents a year, which means over the course of 30 years I’ve had to […]

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“Why is it always on us?” The leader of the wives’ study group looked at Lisa and me, explaining that after reading numerous books on marriage together, it always seemed to come down to the wives being the ones to set the relationship right. All of these women had read many books on marriage. At […]

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February 12, 2015

50 Problems with Grey

Gary Thomas — 

A Husband’s Random Thoughts on Fifty Shades of Grey I’m not into creating lists of “do’s” and “don’ts” that aren’t in Scripture. If anything, the Bible is relatively silent about such lists within marriage. It’s not my intent to disparage any appropriate act that a husband and wife enjoy in their private moments. Yet every […]

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Over 114 million people watched this year’s Super Bowl. Less than a hundred people actually played in it. That’s an infinitesimal percent which closely mirrors, I would guess, the percentage of average marriages to truly intimate marriages. It’s one thing to watch, it’s another thing entirely to play. Far too many couples merely “watch” their […]

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While reading a wonderful book on marriage, I came across some spectacular advice that would be very harmful in one of the marriages I’ve worked with: “I learned that the most romantic gesture I can offer Christi is simply asking about her day, how she’s feeling, and what’s going on in her heart and mind.” […]

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January 20, 2015

From Fiasco to Fine

Gary Thomas — 

The word “fiasco,” something that is considered a complete failure, was born in Italy. Literally, it means to “make a bottle,” or “make a wine glass.” It can have a fascinating connection to marriage. Some of you may recall that my Italian publisher invited Lisa and me to Italy in December to speak at a […]

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What if God makes “art” out of our moments of brokenness, sin, mistakes, and even marital disasters? Joe White is president of Kanakuk Kamps and founder of Kids Across America. He uses a word picture that I’ve found rather moving. He begins by saying that none of God’s “paintings” are on canvas. “They’re all made […]

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  Guest post by Sandy Ralya.. Have you ever been desperate for a breakthrough in your marriage? I mean, the if-something-doesn’t-change-soon-I-don’t-think-I-can-go-on kind of breakthrough? Married at nineteen, I didn’t have a clue about how to deal with the emotional, verbal, and spiritual abuse I suffered. When my husband and I drove through our local McDonald’s, […]

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