Archives For building intimacy

March 7, 2016

Something New

Gary Thomas — 

  There are oceans of marriage experiences out there just waiting to be explored. Too many of us keep swimming in the same kiddie pool. Danger Mouse (a producer and musician from LA) was in a bar shooting pool when he heard a song come over the speakers that mesmerized him. “I just sat and […]

Read More
February 6, 2016

Why Men Don’t Change

Gary Thomas — 

  What if your husband isn’t motivated by your pain? What if he’s only motivated by his? Many wives live with great frustration because they keep telling their husbands that something he is doing (or not doing) is causing them great pain, but the husband never changes. This confuses the wife. She thinks, “If I […]

Read More
January 16, 2016

Choosing Enthusiasm

Gary Thomas — 

Choosing Enthusiasm One of the best gifts you can give your spouse doesn’t cost anything, it’s appropriate for literally every holiday, and you never have to wrap it. I’m talking about enthusiasm. Lisa and I look at food through two radically different lenses. I eat primarily because I hate being hungry, but food isn’t something […]

Read More
January 9, 2016

He Lies

Gary Thomas — 

He lies to you, all the time. Jesus called Satan “the Father of lies,” and if you want an abundant life and marriage, you have to discern those lies. Satan takes normal marital doldrums and turns it into the story of your life. “It won’t get better, it can’t get better. Your only hope is […]

Read More
December 16, 2015

Turtledove Love

Gary Thomas — 

Turtledoves are perhaps most famous for their place in what has become a slightly obnoxious Christmas song: “On the first day of Christmas, my true love sent to me…” Outside of this song, turtledoves are known for two things: they mate for life (thus you almost always find them in pairs) they have no peripheral […]

Read More
November 19, 2015

Make Me Laugh

Gary Thomas — 

As we enter the holidays, here’s something to think about to inject new life into your marriage and family: Laugh together. Think about how to make each other laugh uproariously. Life is tough. Things get serious. If we stop laughing part of us dies. In a very real sense, to stop laughing is to stop […]

Read More
October 24, 2015

Please Don’t Marry Him

Gary Thomas — 

My heart is grieving. I’ve received several Facebook messages from women who asked my advice about a dysfunctional dating relationship when The Sacred Search first came out several years ago. Each one noticed several “red flags” in their dating relationship and asked me if I thought they should be concerned. In every case, the answer […]

Read More

How to Have an Increasingly Happy Marriage One of my favorite teachers of Scripture is in the midst of a series on what makes us happy. Near the beginning of one sermon he (correctly, in my view) challenged those Christians who say, “What if God wants you to be holy instead of happy?” Since the […]

Read More
August 27, 2015

The Only Woman in the World

Gary Thomas — 

Men, if you would like to have superlative satisfaction in your marriage, if you would enjoy a love for your wife that has no comparison, go back with me to the beginning of time—when Adam walked the earth by himself with God. Adam watched little animals and bigger animals, he discovered a wide variety of […]

Read More
August 22, 2015

Finding the “Win-Win”

Guest Author — 

  Too many of us think that anger is like flatulence: it’s an uncomfortable feeling that grows bigger and bigger, but if you just let it out, you’ll feel so much better. Anger doesn’t work that way. When we let anger fly–by yelling, or saying hurtful things–we often make a situation worse. And that’s because […]

Read More