Archives For building intimacy

Singles seeking to marry well can learn so much from a man who got married four hundred years ago. He made a supremely wise choice for all the right reasons and benefitted immensely because of it. Don’t be freaked out that he was a Puritan. Richard Baxter (1615-1691) lived half his life as a single […]

Read More

Readers, When I was writing Cherish, I’d ask wives how they wanted to be cherished. If you poured a cup of coffee right away, it would be room temperature by the time most of them stopped talking. When I’d ask men how they like to be cherished, the most common answer was, “Do you want […]

Read More

If you want to make this Valentine’s Day special, in addition to shopping for the lingerie and chocolate, spend some extra time worshipping God. It’s not that I have anything against chocolate or lingerie (especially lingerie), but three decades of marriage have taught me that personal worship is an absolute must to sustain a strong […]

Read More
February 9, 2017

Forsaking All Others

Gary Thomas — 

Being closer to anyone other than your spouse is a betrayal of your wedding vows. When we think of betraying our wedding vows, we usually think of something sexual or romantic. But there’s a far more common betrayal that isn’t about romance or sex; it’s about emotional connection or relational dependence. The reality is that […]

Read More

There’s a popular joke in New England that expresses just how much affection Patriots fans have for their beloved quarterback. A wife wakes up furious with her husband. “I had a dream last night that you had an affair with Giselle Bundchen!” she shouts and hits him with a pillow. “That’s ridiculous!” the husband protests. […]

Read More

“Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love.” Ecclesiastes 9:9 In my book Pure Pleasure I tell the story of an excruciatingly hot run on an August afternoon in Houston, Texas, well before I moved here. Nobody who lives in Houston actually plans to run at 3:00 p.m. in the middle of August but I […]

Read More
January 10, 2017

A Tale of Two Wives

Gary Thomas — 

“All right,” the event organizer told me, “here’s your ride. His name is Terry.” You’ll have to forgive me for catching my breath, as Terry rolled up in a wheelchair. It was winter in Winnipeg, below freezing, and dark. And my driver, as I already said, was shaking my hand while sitting in a wheelchair. […]

Read More
January 7, 2017

The Marriage You Want

Gary Thomas — 

If you’ve been reading this blog, you’ve heard me talking a lot lately about cherishing our spouse. What does cherish mean? How is cherish different from love? I recently came across a brilliant description of cherishing your spouse that was written hundreds of years ago by a surprising source. I say “surprising” because John Wesley […]

Read More

My last post “Enough is Enough” crashed our website several times. We’ve had to upgrade our website platform and pay for the frantic efforts to keep the blog up in the midst of the overload. We’re so sorry for the frustration you’ve had and the ensuing issues that followed (like earlier blog posts not being […]

Read More
November 22, 2016

Feed Your Marriage

Gary Thomas — 

Many of us (at least in the U.S.) are making all sorts of plans about how to feed ourselves and our family on Thanksgiving Day. Let’s pause to consider how we can feed our marriage. But first, let me set this up. Do you remember the time your baby had a sopping wet diaper? Let’s […]

Read More