Archives For building intimacy

Are Jesus’ words worth trying out? Seriously: do you think he has sufficiently proven himself to you to the point where you owe it to him to believe he knows what he’s talking about? If so, let me suggest a thirty-day marriage experiment rooted in Jesus’ new commandment, given in John 15:12: “This is my […]

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Do you have sympathy for your spouse, or do you have empathy? It’ll show between the sheets. Here’s the difference between the two, as described by Les Parrott, who has written a wonderful (soon to be released) book entitled Love Like That.  Sympathy means that if you are standing on a dock and see someone […]

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  Professional counselor Debra Fileta offers some helpful advice this week for those who no longer find themselves attracted to their spouse. What does that do to the sexual relationship? How should we respond? Deb combines much real-world experience (working with numerous couples) and biblical insight to offer a workable plan. I hope you enjoy it, […]

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When I first wrote Sacred Influence in 2004, pornography got a few paragraphs. When I rewrote Sacred Influence to become Loving Him Well (just released), a wife dealing with her husband’s pornography became an entire chapter. In fact, it is now the longest chapter in the book. The rise of high-speed Internet access has transformed […]

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March 23, 2018

Taking Action

Gary Thomas — 

When Your Marriage is Going in the Wrong Direction, Doing Nothing is Usually Your Worst Choice [Note: this week’s blog post is an adaptation from my newly released book Loving Him Well: Practical Advice for Influencing Your Husband, which is a rewritten version of Sacred Influence. For this reason, it primarily addresses women and wives, […]

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February 10, 2018

Mr. Fix It

Gary Thomas — 

  [Note: the last post began a three-part series helping wives understand the way their husbands think. You can read that post here: Understanding the Mind of the Man You Married. All these posts are adapted from Gary’s newest book, Loving Him Well: Practical Advice for Influencing Your Husband. This post also has much relevant […]

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January 31, 2018

The Bubble Busting Spouse

Gary Thomas — 

Robert has an admittedly sordid history with pornography. He has been in recovery for years, has set up appropriate accountability and has gone out of his way to rebuild his marriage. He has (in his words) “devoured” my book Cherish and has sought to apply every principle in every chapter. He knows he can never […]

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In his book The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis shows how wide-ranging the word “love” is. It is used to define many different notions and mind-sets. What if you can take your marriage up a level this year? The first form of love (according to Lewis) is Need-Love, which is today what we call infatuation. “I […]

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It’s hard to believe, but we’re near the end of 2017. It’s been a good year. 2016, on the other hand, was not my favorite. I put on a lot of weight, didn’t watch what I ate, and didn’t exercise on a consistent basis. I swept some unresolved conflict with my boss under the rug […]

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December 14, 2017

Born to Die

Gary Thomas — 

As most Christians know, one of the most shocking gifts given to the baby Jesus was myrrh. It was one of three gifts typically given to kings. Matthew may not have intended it to predict Jesus’ death (myrrh was typically used for burial purposes). But the symbolism is impossible to ignore from a theological perspective: […]

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