Archives For building intimacy

January 10, 2017

A Tale of Two Wives

Gary Thomas — 

“All right,” the event organizer told me, “here’s your ride. His name is Terry.” You’ll have to forgive me for catching my breath, as Terry rolled up in a wheelchair. It was winter in Winnipeg, below freezing, and dark. And my driver, as I already said, was shaking my hand while sitting in a wheelchair. […]

Read More
January 7, 2017

The Marriage You Want

Gary Thomas — 

If you’ve been reading this blog, you’ve heard me talking a lot lately about cherishing our spouse. What does cherish mean? How is cherish different from love? I recently came across a brilliant description of cherishing your spouse that was written hundreds of years ago by a surprising source. I say “surprising” because John Wesley […]

Read More

My last post “Enough is Enough” crashed our website several times. We’ve had to upgrade our website platform and pay for the frantic efforts to keep the blog up in the midst of the overload. We’re so sorry for the frustration you’ve had and the ensuing issues that followed (like earlier blog posts not being […]

Read More
November 22, 2016

Feed Your Marriage

Gary Thomas — 

Many of us (at least in the U.S.) are making all sorts of plans about how to feed ourselves and our family on Thanksgiving Day. Let’s pause to consider how we can feed our marriage. But first, let me set this up. Do you remember the time your baby had a sopping wet diaper? Let’s […]

Read More
October 25, 2016

Marriage in a Bikini

Gary Thomas — 

Lisa and I love watching the Olympics, and this summer there were several sports in which we caught just about every event. One of them was beach volleyball. During a crucial game, one of the U.S. women’s teams had a rough go. A seasoned veteran wasn’t having her best day, and the opposing team kept […]

Read More

What if one of the things we need is something we don’t want? One of the things I love about marriage is that it can lead us to places where we will be all but forced to rely on God like we never have before. My friend Rett gulped deeply when the doctor told him […]

Read More
October 11, 2016

Getting Better all the Time

Gary Thomas — 

Lisa and I returned home from our honeymoon and moved into a trailer in a trailer park, in the middle of nowhere. It was rent free, offered by a family friend and we had almost no money. Lisa didn’t complain. When we moved to go to seminary, I found a room for rent in the […]

Read More

This blog spends plenty of time helping spouses deal with disappointment and difficult marriages. In this post, however, I want to encourage couples who are happy in their relationship and delighted with each other by providing a “trick” to further increase that love and happiness. Happy couples get far too little attention in blogs and […]

Read More

How many times have you done what you genuinely believed was best for your kids or spouse—your entire motivation was their well-being—and they responded with, “Why do you hate me?” It’s excruciating to exhibit love and have the person you love respond with charges of hate. You do something for your spouse, or say something […]

Read More
August 31, 2016

Celebrating “Okay” Sex

Gary Thomas — 

  What if “okay sex” is okay? Where do we get our expectations that every act of marital sex is supposed to be a candidate for the highlight reel of marital ecstasy? In our ever present desire to “one up” the world, Christians are fond of exaggerating. That’s in part what led me to write […]

Read More