Archives For Divorce

I like giving and receiving gifts. My wife Lisa doesn’t. In my young stupid pride, I used to double down on gift giving opportunities, find something really creative to give to Lisa, perhaps a bit too expensive for our current budget and Lisa would be touched and moved but feel guilty that I was (in […]

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October 23, 2019

She Married Him Anyway

Gary Thomas — 

A recent news article caught my eye: a would-be bride caught her soon-to-be husband sexually assaulting an inebriated bridesmaid the day before the wedding. What astonished me even more was the last sentence of the article: friends of the couple “confirmed” that the ceremony went on as planned… My heart rejoices at the healing and […]

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If you adopt a wolverine and pour all your love into that animal; if you treat it like a puppy, hugging it and feeding it and playing with it; if you give it the very best care anyone has ever given to a wolverine, the day will still come when that wolverine will attack you, […]

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If you want freedom from toxic people, you have to learn how to be okay with others not being okay with you. Historically, I’ve been rather weak in this regard. I hate it when people aren’t okay with me. Even toxic people. That weakness gives them a power they don’t deserve and potential control that […]

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After I had been hitting my head against a wall dealing with a toxic individual, asking myself “Why?” and “How do I fix this/handle this/deal with this?” a wise friend, Dr. Steve Wilke, dispensed some life-changing advice. He urged me not to deal with it but to simply walk away. “I want you to go […]

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August 23, 2019

6 Ways to Grow Back Together

Gary Thomas — 

Emily and William were deeply in love fifteen years and three children ago, but time and responsibility have taken their toll. “In the end, we’re different people who want different things. I’m just not sure we can make it work anymore,” Emily said, and William nodded in agreement. The cynical side of me wanted to […]

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It’s been exactly a year since Lisa went into surgery to have her tumor removed. That morning, she told me she wanted two things. First, she wanted me holding her hand and praying for her as she was taken away, and second, she wanted to wake up from sedation without the breathing tube still in […]

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To understand how difficult it is to be married to a certain kind of person, you need to know that the Bible was written in a desert. The Promised Land is described as a place of “milk and honey” but even the most generous of geographers would call it “arid.” Average temperatures run in the […]

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June 19, 2019

Never Surrender

Gary Thomas — 

A divorce lawyer recently posted an article arguing that the vow “till death do us part” is passé, unrealistic, and needs to be discarded. There’s no shame, he said, in knowing that it’s unlikely and “even rare” for marriages to last for a lifetime, so let’s stop with the pretense. He admitted children face some […]

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March 27, 2019

The Ongoing Sin of Divorce

Gary Thomas — 

Heather married a Christian man who seemed zealous to serve God. He gave generous amounts of money to God’s work and even dreamed of eventually doing a reverse tithe—giving away ninety percent of his income and keeping ten percent for himself. Today he’s still involved in missions work, still gives away a lot of money, […]

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