Archives For Blog

Family life often calls us to deny ourselves, to put others’ needs above our own. If we cherish our spouse, however, we’ll work hard to make the denial a season instead of a lifelong sacrifice. When Donnie and Jaclyn lived in Nashville, they had so little money they depended on food stamps. Jaclyn was pursuing […]

Read More
April 28, 2017

Married for Adversity

Gary Thomas — 

“A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.”  (Prov. 17:17) You’d be miserable indeed if you trained to become a fireman and resented it every time there was a fire. Not that you want there to be a fire, but putting out fires is what you’re trained to do. It’s […]

Read More
April 20, 2017

Your Boyfriend’s Brain

Gary Thomas — 

  Single women, your boyfriend’s brain is very different than yours. If you try to evaluate him like you’d evaluate a girlfriend or sister, you’re going to fail. You’ll miss cues. The male brain and the female brain diverge immediately upon conception. So, if you want to make a wise marital match, spend a little […]

Read More
April 5, 2017

Good People

Gary Thomas — 

By God’s grace, I’ve been fortunate to meet many of the people who often make news; because some of them happen to be conservative Christians who occasionally take politically unpopular stands, the news isn’t always so kind. Then you meet them face to face and are overwhelmed by the quality of faith and kindness and […]

Read More
March 28, 2017

Real Repentance

Gary Thomas — 

“Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 11 See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done.” 2 Corinthians 7:10-11 If a spouse has been […]

Read More

There’s a simple definition of cherishing that doesn’t fully encompass the word, but it’s an essential slice of it. If you cherish someone, you seek to enhance their life. If you cherish a diamond, you set it in gold and regularly shine it. If you cherish a car, it gets washes and waxes and you […]

Read More

It has been so exciting for Lisa and me to watch the enthusiastic reception of Cherish. We’re so glad this message is taking root and re-energizing marriages and re-adjusting goals. One caveat is in order, however: the central message of Sacred Marriage is still true: marriages aren’t easy, but God can use the difficulties and […]

Read More

While writing Cherish, a good friend of mine who does a lot of counseling warned me that many spouses—up to 30%, in fact—actively resist being cherished by their spouse. They sabotage their own happiness because they don’t see themselves as “cherishable” and thus resist any efforts their spouse might make to cherish them. If you […]

Read More

Singles seeking to marry well can learn so much from a man who got married four hundred years ago. He made a supremely wise choice for all the right reasons and benefitted immensely because of it. Don’t be freaked out that he was a Puritan. Richard Baxter (1615-1691) lived half his life as a single […]

Read More

Readers, When I was writing Cherish, I’d ask wives how they wanted to be cherished. If you poured a cup of coffee right away, it would be room temperature by the time most of them stopped talking. When I’d ask men how they like to be cherished, the most common answer was, “Do you want […]

Read More